Please Read Our Manifesto

Based on Cyprus 1989

You see there’s no deceit
We were sceptical too

But we saw our son get his jabs, then started acting mad:

He sings The Real Me dawn ’til dusk!

You cannot trust the doctors
Despite their kind words and degrees

They never even mentioned
These horrid side-effects: he also sings Brazil

Don’t opt for vaccination:
A manifesto for our times
So says a site we’ve googled

It’s full of super tips, may even have a cure

It seems too much hygiene has made our children weak

To:
– Bring back kids’ good health
– Cure mental lunacy

That webpage shows how to proceed:

Bring sprogs around on Tuesdays
Exposing them to other’s germs

Should they remain quite healthy
These subtle extra tasks will kickstart their immune:

Spread snot on the halloumi
And share it out cut up in cubes

Then sneeze on the tzatziki
While telling everyone the double dip’s approved

With luck one of them gets
Sniffles (or much worse)

Don’t bin that crap they cough up
No, store it in a jar

Mix phlegm with kounoupidi
And use a spoon licked clean by dogs

Stuff pus inside the koupes
And serve it dipped in spit…

You’ll hear the kids scream “ooooo”

We recommend this treatment
Our son’s song taste is much improved

He now sings Aspro Mavro
He’s almost good as new, though still he sings Shiru

Let’s sing aloud these lyrics
To friends and strangers, far and near

“A pox on all your children!”

Explain that it is not

The insult they’d assume

Exclusively Available at Our Weekly Meetings